Tuesday, October 29, 2013

CONCEBIDA EN UNA VIOLACIÓN


Darlene Pawlik – NH



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Me llamo Darlene Pawlik. Mi padre es un violador en serie.

En el año 1966, Claire tenía 16 años. Un chico nuevo de la escuela la invitó a ir al cine y, como era encantador, sus padres le dieron permiso. A la vuelta, el joven propuso que tomaran un atajo y la violó en un terraplén que había entre el cine y su casa.

Estaba tan avergonzada que no se lo contó a nadie pero, cuando advirtió que estaba embarazada, se confió a su madre aunque sin prodigarse en detalles ya que, en su fuero interno, entendía que era un asunto que les incumbía sólo a ellos. Debido a la presión del entorno social del momento se casó con el chico y vivían en la misma zona. El joven tenía una gran habilidad para camelarse a la gente pero, en realidad, era violento y su familia fría y desalmada.

Durante los dos años en que vivieron en un cobertizo propiedad de su familia la violaba continuamente pero ella no dijo nada a nadie hasta que se quedó embarazada por segunda vez. Entonces, Claire advirtió a su madre de que se quitaría la vida si no la sacaba  de allí.

Supe los detalles de mi concepción cuando era aún muy joven. Mi madre venía de un hogar desestructurado y tenía muchos problemas. Nos solíamos mudar de casa todos los años e incluso siguió siendo así cuando se casó con su segundo marido. También descubrí que mi padre había violado a otras chicas.

Mi infancia fue difícil. Mi hermana y yo pasábamos fines de semana con la familia de nuestro padre y él abusaba de nosotras incluso con la aquiescencia de su familia que, mediante amenazas, nos asustaba y nos conminaba a guardar silencio. Mi madre no era consciente de todo esto.

Fuimos víctimas de abusos durante años. Mi hermana y yo estamos contentas por haber sobrevivido, por no haber sido abortadas y agradecidas a nuestra madre que  apostó por nuestra vida. Durante mi adolescencia me escapé, me raptaron y vendieron, traficaron conmigo, me violaron y golpearon y caí en las drogas y el alcohol. Pululé por las calles taciturna y con la carencia de un padre a quién yo voluntariamente repudiaba porque era un violador. Me daba la impresión de que toda la ciudad sabía de su brutalidad.

No me planteé cambiar de vida hasta que me quedé embarazada. El padre de mi bebé era un hombre casado, un mafioso del crimen organizado. Yo para él era tan sólo un pasatiempo más, una de las muchas chicas que le proporcionaba un proxeneta. Me amenazó con matarme si no abortaba y yo que sabía que era capaz concerté la cita delante de él.

Pero aquella noche soñé con el procedimiento de un abortó y vi con nitidez que era aterrador. Así que me las ingenié para fingir que había abortado y actué como si la interrupción se hubiese llevado a cabo. Él insistió en llevarme a cenar y, aunque estaba aterrada ante la idea de que lo pudiera descubrir, tuve que aceptar. Le pedí que, después del trago que había pasado, me dejara marchar y él convencido de que había abortado,  me lo permitió.

Nuestras vidas no son menos valiosas que las que vienen de un acto de amor. Tengo cinco hijos y dos nietos. Mis hijos son personas normales que trabajan y yo misma he servido a la sociedad de muchas y variadas maneras durante los 25 años en que he trabajado de enfermera.

Rechazo totalmente la idea que tiene la sociedad de que una mujer violada debe abortar. A los violadores, como mi padre, no los persiguen y los condenan a la pena de muerte por su crimen y, sin embargo, al niño inocente fruto de esa violación, sí. A la gente le parece normal  matar  al niño que como yo o tantos otros fue concebido en una violación y esto es un sin sentido.

Es abominable animar a una madre violada a que aborte. El hijo que espera no es sólo el hijo de un violador sino que es su propio hijo. Matar a ese niño es un crimen. La mujer ya ha sido suficientemente ultrajada, su dignidad rota por un violador, para que además sea nuevamente atacada cuando se la pretende despojar de esa maternidad. Añadir al trauma de una violación la atrocidad de un aborto es incrementar su dolor. La gestación es temporal. La madre que da a luz y entrega a su hijo en adopción puede respirar tranquila porque ha hecho lo correcto.

El mundo es muy variopinto, plagado de dolor, luchas y sin sabores pero, a la vez, lleno de bondad, felicidad y paz para quién se esfuerza en encontrarlo. Dios tiene un plan para todos nosotros con independencia de las circunstancias de nuestra concepción y de las decisiones equivocadas o acertadas que hayamos tomado. Mientras vivamos siempre tendremos la posibilidad de un cambio, de una conversión y de un mañana mejor.

Tuesday, October 22, 2013

She is called, Maria.

Maria, the mystery child found in squaller in Greece, has gained the attention of the world.

The couple who had her were taken into custody for abduction. The news is sketchy, at best.  At its worst, if may be hyping a story as benign as a couple who took care of a young girl when her mother couldn't.  That is the story the couple is telling.

It is curious.  At least ten families are hoping she is their missing child. If ten families are thinking this one may be their missing baby, how many missing children are there?   She meets certain specifications after all.  Just think of detailed specifics she meets in order to qualify for consideration.  Mind boggling.

Then there is the media.  One of the reporters kept calling her, "it".  She would say, "The child is at a facility, run by a charity."  "It is undergoing tests."  "It is playing and laughing."  "It has been evaluated."  How could this reporter think she should be called, "it".      

What the heck is that?  She is between three and six years old.  Is she not a person yet?  Does she not deserve the designation of a proper or appropriate pronoun?  Does she not deserve the dignity of a person?

It was a heartbreaking report, mainly because of the reporter's dehumanizing treatment of this precious little person.  It is unclear how she came to be among the people she was with.  Maybe it will be found out.

One thing is clear though.  She is a person.  She is being called Maria.  God has a special purpose for her.

The same is true of all people, born and unborn, disabled and athletic, genius and developmentally retarded, young and elderly.  People deserve respect and dignity.  We are a compassionate community.  Let us never dehumanize others by ignoring their humanity.  Every person is unique.  Everyone is special.  Everybody deserves to be acknowledged.




Saturday, October 19, 2013

Do You FB?

I Facebook.

I really enjoy it.  From the cute to the controversial, I love to like and comment.  It has been a way to connect with people of like mind and it is a tool for things like missing people to gain exposure.  Some people use it for family, some for fun, some for ministry or promoting their views.  There are politicians and pundits, brokers and entrepreneurs everywhere.

I have a diverse group of Friends.  Many are from real-estate, many are pro lifers, some family, from my church, friends of my children, and political friends.  On occasion I have no idea how we are friends and some of my friends are of no consequence to me at all.  They may be friends of friends or friends of a person that I don't even know.

FB has so many positive aspects.  Community and camaraderie are important, as are dispute and discussion.  It can get pretty intimate at times with too much information shared between people in public.  I wonder if the same people would have that conversation in a grocery store or the mall.  Other times it can get so nasty.  I wonder if the isolation of the computer screen gives some people bravado that they lack in 'real life'.

I am relatively non-confrontational on my own behalf, but I can stick up for others in person and online.

FB has some negatives too though.  One is the 'last year's post'.  This could be a very old post of an event or story, even a missing person report that has long since been resolved.  It can be ridiculous to share, causing angst among real friends or just make a person look foolish.

Then there is the memes and pictures.  You have heard of photoshop, right?  Some pictures are not real.  Some pictures of people with a meme plastered on the top or bottom are not quotes!  So many times people are lead to believe that the meme is attributable to the person in the pic.  I laugh at the responses, but in some cases it can cause trouble when people believe it.  You cannot believe everything on your wall.

I think it was Ronald Reagan that said, "Trust, but verify."

So, do you FB?


Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Light Pushes

Light Pushes through the mist from the street lamp.  Its reach seems to be limited to the immediate area of illumination, but I realize that the light has actually reached the ground and surrounding area, diffuse and dim.

Likewise, hope pushes through my circumstances.  I read stories and watch the news about so many tragic, horrible events.  I can look at my own life and get down because of unmet expectations or difficulties. We live in a fallen world, full of strife and real evil.  Stupidity seems to reign.  Crimes of all sorts are perpetrated in view of others, cameras and for the most transient, insignificant reasons.  So much of it isn't as much evil as foolish.

Even when I have a severe bout of depression, one lasting weeks in which tears are ever present and my only desire is to lie down and not get up, one in which I find myself shrugging and shaking my head unconsciously as I try to plot out my time, trying to get through each day is a struggle, hope is a tiny light.

Anyone and everyone can get pulled under, if they look around and focus on the bad stuff.  There is so much of it and our modern media is constantly pumping out sensationalism. Drawing on our emotions is the way to get and keep our attention.  

But how do we fan the spark into a flame that will get us out of the slump?  I suggest that each of us must decide to take the measures that we need to in order to resist depression.  If that means meds or exercise, change of diet or sunlamp, supplements or counseling, we must.  There is too much to do.  We must engage.  

There are so many issues to confront for the sake of our fellow humans.  Each of us is here for a reason.  Each of us has a particular purpose and no one else on the planet is so precisely equipped to solve the problems of our time.  

You are important.  You have special gifts and talents.  You have a mission.  

Find out what it is and refuse to allow the circumstances of your life to stop you.

In pain? Broke? No time? Disabled? Depressed? Contagious illness? 

If you are reading this, no circumstance will stop you from your destiny.  

Slow movement in the right direction is still movement. Do something.

Do you have hope enough for goals each day?


Monday, October 7, 2013

What's Out Your Window?

A friend of mine commented about the neighborhood he lives in.  He said that it must be a rule to take any heated argument outside and for those involved to yell and scream as loudly as possible.

It often seems like that is what the media is trying to do with the country at large.  We all live here in this giant neighborhood of the USA with the media as our windows and doors.  So, when there is something going on we are exposed to it.  Especially when it comes to any elected officials, but often people who we consider stars or military leaders, criminals too often, other country's leaders and occasionally regular people.  We agree on a lot of things, but we disagree about a lot too.

The Affordable Care Act aka Obamacare is one of the most contentious arguments in the window right now, but it is inextricably linked to underlying issues of liberty and control.

Like my friend's neighborhood, where the people hear the exposed part of the fight, we get only so much from the windows of media.

Labels are impossible for me to use here, because the definitions are complicated and diverse, depending on who is reading.  For example; progressives are seen in the rosiest light to many and to the liberty minded, local control loving they are the enemy.

So, I simply say that I hope and pray for those who have the power to right the ship will do so.  Our country is no more "The land of the free, because of the brave."

Somehow, the current administration has survived, scandal after scandal and they seem untouchable.  We are a murderous nation and it will be worse when the ACA is fully implemented.  The law has a complete strangle hold on our country already.  When implemented there will be no liberty for anyone at all.  You and I will work to pay for unspeakable evil.

Americans already subsidize abortion.  President Obama loves Planned Parenthood.  Abortion is a horrific train wreck with tragic consequences for all.  The ACA takes a leap forward in terms of killing.  Free abortions paid for by the few people who will still work.

Then there are the bell curve care charts.  They may not kill.  They may deny care based on criteria set forth by the Department of Health and Human Services. The same people who didn't want to allow a child to have a lung transplant because she was a few months too old.

While I am not sure about whether a government shut down is the answer, the question is that important.  The strategy of shutting down parks in order to bring the entire country out to participate in the fight is intriguing.  I wonder what the test really is.

Thank God there are people thinking and not just looking out the window accepting the superficial.  Here is my view.


Friday, October 4, 2013

How Can it Be?


How can it be?

How can it be that our Government is going about doing bad?  This of course, is in direct contrast with the testimony that Jesus went around doing good. 

Spending money we neither have nor will ever be able to recover.  Giving this printed money to so many people and so many countries is ridiculous.  Of course, there are some people who need a hand up, temporary assistance is a wonderful thing.  However; it should not be a mechanism to impose a new kind of slavery on a population.  Controlling people by providing for them is a wicked, cruel trap.

Social engineering has always been around, but this silly disrespectful tactic of shutting down parks and barricading monuments is destine to backfire.

Is the administration trying to incite riots?  It seems rather similar to the Occupy movements style of radical disruption.  It might be a distraction, but imposing such misdirected, childish retaliation is lighting up the airwaves.  Many, many people are talking about how messed up this is.  What should we be looking for?

What would our Founders do?  “They are turning over in their graves.” One person said.  But really, what would they have done?  I think I will have to get out a copy of the Federalist Papers and the AntiFederalist Papers as well as some of their writings to find out.  Surely, they would not put up with this.

My friends ask how it is that they are getting away with this.  The really upset people are the honorable ones.  They are upset, even furious, but they don’t play with despots.  So, the have kept their heads, so far.  Honor and dignity, fidelity and liberty are the highest marks of character to be retained.  They watch and learn.  

What will come of this?